linden_jay: (Baby is sleeping...shhh...)
It's been a full week since my interview, I've heard nothing yet, and they're still running the ad in the paper. I'm really not sure what to take from that... or what the policy is for what someone should do, in this eventuality. Is a follow-up email appropriate? Assuming I could find an email address to even write to. Gah. This is why I hate looking for work. Just hire me, people! I'm awesome! I will bring the internets to vouch for me! I'm organized and all kinds of shiny... can the people in my RPG who have seen my dorktastic organizational skills be my reference? Perhaps not.

The Frog and Monkey are mostly over the cold/flu/respiratory virus of doom, except that the Frog is still coughing his little lungs out. All night. Which wakes him up even more than usual, which wakes me up even more than usual. I can't tell if my sore throat is just a protest of the seasonal change and lack of sleep, or if I'm getting Since I don't know that I ever got over being sick in the first place.

It's kind of ridiculous the stuff that happens while under the influence of lack of sleep. I know that the Frog woke me up at sometime past 5:00am. I know that I took him to bed with me and we both fell back asleep. I know that I did not put him back in his crib. I have no memory record of the Academic Husband coming in and relieving me of the Frog. So, at some point, he came in and like, literally took my wee one out of my arms and spirited away with him... and I do not remember this at all. One hopes that if it were someone, y'know, OTHER than my husband doing that, I would remember it. SIGH.


Apr. 14th, 2010 11:03 am
linden_jay: (Otter is sleepy)
That's the sound of me hitting the floor. Ergh.

Know what's unfair? Having to be charming and intelligent in an interview on less than two hours of sleep. Oh. I had an interview. Did I mention that I had an interview? Because I had an interview. My maternity leave only covers me until mid-May, and I won't go back to work at my really job until September, and the boy's work will start to seriously slow down in June, so... job. Even though I don't want to go back to work. I want to stay home with my babies until they go to school. Why can't the world be like that? It's nofe air.

So yes. Interview. For a hotel. Which I said I'd never work at again, and yet, the ad came up in the paper, and I answered it. I think the interview went well. I think I talked too much, but that's nothing new, and at least this time I managed to keep from doing my worst ever thing I do in interviews when I get nervous--interrupting the person who's interviewing me. I mean, WTF, Jay! Way to self-sabotage!

I'll know something by the end of the week, and while I really don't want to work... I do want the job. So, think happy thoughts for me? Please?

linden_jay: (Otter is sleepy)
Sigh. The Frog did not sleep. I know, right? Shock. He's still sick, still snotty, and I think he keeps trying to breathe through his nose in the middle of the night, not being able to do it, and freaking himself out into a coughing fit because of it. Every. 45. to. 90. Minutes. Good grief on toast.

You know it's bad when the babies are so tired and snarky that they can't get through a bowl of applesauce. Take a bite, lip tremble, SOB. Only an hour after they wake up. Okay, back to bed for you. Never mind that Mummy hasn't slept yet, that's immaterial! Clearly we need a nap! Except... why are you bouncing in your crib? Two minutes ago you were so tired you were rubbing apple sauce in your eyes and hair... and now you're bouncing? WOT? That makes NO SENSE.

Babies are freaks, man. Also possibly evil.

I was already prepared for today to suck. I'm a month away from running out of maternity leave (I know, cry moar you Canadian, with your year long paid maternity leave), but that means that I need to find more work. Because my job won't start up again until September, because that's when the new school year starts.

There are two things I hate more than anything in the world: doing the cold call walk in the door and drop off a resume thing, and training for a new job once I get the new job. HATE HATE HATE. I hate not being good at things. I hate the fucking up until you get it right stage. Plus, I'm convinced that my resume looks like it was put together by a particularly intelligent Shi-tzu.

I think that I don't hear babies. Oh please, please let me be right. I am so tired.
linden_jay: (Jayne- I could get nekkid)
Babies are evil, sleep is non-existent. Oh well, at least my current issues are ecologically sound. I'm recycling.

The Monkey also has nasty diaper rash, which seems to be bothering me more than it's bothering her, at least in the sense that I want it to go away, and she doesn't seem to be all that in pain or itchy because of it. However, since it has currently refused to respond to the fistfuls of zinc cream I've put on it, we're trying something new.

Leave the baby naked.

I can sense that some of you are seeing some flaws with this plan. First of all... it's winter. Second of all... the baby is not wearing a diaper. Yeah. I know. This is gonna be a fun couple of days.

The one positive in all of this? She thinks that getting to be naked=Christmas and her birthday all wrapped up in one. So, at least she's happy.
linden_jay: (Kitten- shite)

So, yeah. We've had family visiting this weekend, and that's been stressful, as well as completely blowing any sleep schedule that the babies have to shit, not that they take to scheduling all that well at the best of times. But you can guarantee that when they get home at 10pm, it's not gonna do anything good for getting them to sleep, and to sleep well. So two nights this weekend, it's been pretty much a wash as far as having them sleep anything even close to resembling the night. So I've been up with them a couple times a night, which I'm used to, but I've been struggling with sleep myself by the time I finally get them both down, or it's late enough so the Academic Husband can take over if they do wake up.

This whole time, we've had a double bed in the nursery, and one of us has always slept in the same room as the babies, either having one in each room, or both in the nursery and one of us in there. But they've been finally sleeping longer than 2 hours at a time (thank you Frog), so I decided to move the bed into the office, which is right next to the nursery, freeing up some room in the nursery for a couple of dressers, which we really need because baby clothes spawn more baby clothes. Especially socks.

It was six am before I think I finally went to sleep at all, maybe later, and the boy got a call that he had to work, so I had to be up again by eight. I got up, hung out with the babies, and since they were cranky (unsurprising), I put them both down to sleep by about eight thirty. Frog in the master bedroom in a playpen, Monkey in the nursery in her crib. I usually split them up for naps so that they don't disturb each other if one sleeps longer.

And I thought, hey, since I'm exhausted off my ass, why don't I try that 'sleep while the baby sleeps' thing that I've been hearing about. Apparently all the cool kids are doing it. So I went into the office (so not to disturb the Frog sleeping in the master bedroom) and curled up under the covers.

And I wake up at about 12:30, with my mom standing at the foot of my bed.

She and my husband had been trying to reach me, and couldn't. They called my cell phone, which was right next to my head. I didn't hear it. They called the land line, which is very loud and annoying. I didn't hear it. So my mom decided to swing by on her lunch break and find out if we were all sleeping. Oh, I was sleeping all right. But the babies weren't. They were in hysterics, screaming and crying, and I didn't hear it. Not a bit of it. I just kept sleeping. And there's no way for me to know how long they were crying like that.

So my mom calmed my sobbing children down, fed them lunch, woke me to check on me, let me sleep another hour or so, then woke me up for a shower before she left around two. And right now, I feel so guilty and horrible about the whole thing that I could either burst into tears or throw up. Maybe both.
linden_jay: (Jared and his emo hoodie)
I've been out of sorts lately, behind in writing and posting and commenting and tagging in all the games that I'm in, on my journal, on my everywhere. And it's been bugging me and stressing me out when I realized that it's been since sometime in August since I've posted anything, and that I've got a few tags that have been lingering since spring. I hate that. I hate not being organized, and I really hate being behind. And then I started doing the math on things.

In May--there were those baby-creatures who showed up, and a twelve day hospital stay to go along with it.

Summer--baby things, combined with insanely hot temperatures that made doing anything just about impossible.

And then? August hit, and that's when things really fell apart. )
linden_jay: (Gummi Bears--Tools of Revenge)
Isn't part of the fun in having twins that you can conduct experiments?

Like, have one of them watch the Star Wars moving in release order (4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3), and have one of them watch them in numerical order?

Or would that be wrong?

This pondering brought to you by Jay on far too little sleep.
linden_jay: (Buffy BLEAH)
You know what's tiring? Canning pears.

You know what's really tiring? Canning pears and looking after twins.

I know I'll be grateful in a few months when the babies are eating solids and there's jars and jars of canned pears and peaches to work with. Right now?

Fuck, I'm tired.

(Also, there's the part where the Frog (and the Academic Husband) learned new words when a jar shattered as my mum took it out of the boiling water, all over the floor. Good times...)
linden_jay: (Kitten--bites his thumb at you)
Why is it that when you're exhausted-fucking-tired, and you've got to get up idiotically early the next day, that's always the day that you can't sleep? Why, why, why, why must Murphy be such a stone cold bitch?

I really did think I was going to be able to go to sleep. I haven't slept well all weekend, and I feel so freakin' wiped. And yet. Up there, cuddled up with Academic Husband and the kittens, and nothing. Zero love from the sleep gods, no help from the dreamspace. Gah.

And when I say idiotically early, I totally mean it. I'm talking like, getting up at four-freakin'-am and going into work, because I've got a shitload of shit to get through, and I didn't want to go in over the weekend 'cause I was sleeping so badly. And the less sleep I get, the less chance I'm going to actually respond when that alarm clock goes off at three-fucking-thirty.

Ugh. I'm tired. And whiny. Just y'know. If you didn't notice.

*throws temper tantrum and sends self off to sit in the corner*
linden_jay: (Angel-Lindsey- more comfortable)
It's my last week of work at the old job. Of course, because Murphy is a tricky bastard, it's not going to go down without a fight. )

The new job is doing better... )

Real life that is not work is getting slightly more complicated, and slightly more interesting than it has been. Which brings me to the un-cut portion of tonight's post. I've decided to create a journal that will be a little more focused on things of a real life nature. I'll probably still post Jay-related stuff over here as well, or crosspost/link but it's likely to be centered over there.

Some of it may be flocked, most of it won't be, but I'm giving people the option of friending it if they want to read that, since some of the stuff I'm going to be nattering on about over there will have little to do with things fanfic or game related, and some people may not be interested in that. So--yes. If that's something you're interested in, it'll be over at [ profile] jay_bean. Friend, don't friend, lurk, kick back and hang out, whatever you please, but you're welcome.
linden_jay: (Daniel Craig does not give a damn)
Today, my socks COMPLETELY clash with not just my shirt, but my underwear as well.

This small rebellion brought to you by: Jay's complete lack of REM sleep.
linden_jay: (Amidala- Heroine addict)
You know what the big problem is when you live in a place that's Pacific Standard Time AND you're an insomniac? It just completely increases the amount of time you're conscious when April Fools is in play. I've already fallen for at least one big prank, and considering how sleepy I am, it likely won't be the last. And now I'm off to work at an elementary school. Oh. Joy. This should be entertaining. Except not. I really feel bad for people who have people get sick or hurt or die today. Like that's not a bad enough phone call to make without people bursting out laughing on the other end of the phone, or yelling at them that their joke is in bad taste.

In other stuff and things, I have so much stuff to do and talk about that my brain is indeed ready to explode. I owe comments and tags and emails and posts and meme results andandandandand, and I'll totally get to them, I promise, as soon as I learn to sleep and can put down the paper bag I'm breathing into long enough to type.
linden_jay: (Stage manager = God)
I need more hours in the day. I know, I know, doesn't everyone? But no--I need more hours. I need to work at the library at the school that I'm at, then race to another office and work for three hours for the International Student department, then race right to rehearsals, five days a week.

See, what really works for me is when I go through those phases where I only need 4-5 hours of sleep in a night. I don't sleep much, but it's good sleep. Concentrated or something. These days, I'm sleeping eight or nine hours, but it's on and off, waking and crashing again, never quite finishing a REM cycle. That sucks. Especially when Tarfun decides to play glitter ball soccer on top of the bed while I'm trying to sleep. She thinks I'm just pretending, I think, since she keeps pushing the ball into my hand and waiting for me to throw it for her. Yes. My cats are weird.

Overall, things are mostly okay. The show's going well, work's going well. And I forgot to update people, but my Nana's doing all right. She's out of the hospital, and we don't know what it was that was wrong with her, we just know it's not happening any more. So.. good? I guess?

I'm still having to go to massage therapy for my back getting crunched in that dumbassed car accident, which is not fun. I imagine regular massages that are for relaxation are fun. These are the kind of 'oh, does that hurt? Let me POKE AT IT MORE until you're in tears.' It's helping though, so that's good at the very least.

Okay. Working. Making schedules for rehearsals. Trying not to panic about how little time is left to get this show up and running and ready. BREATHE.
linden_jay: (Get Fuzzy- Dear Lord Make it stop)
This is the second day in a row that I can actually remember every hour, on the hour, all night long, with the knowledge that I only dozed a little bit between each of them.

So of course, while desperately trying to get at least a little more time with my eyes closed, if not sleeping, before I have to be at work at nine, the phone rings at 7:30.

The secretary is sick. They need me in the office all day.

When does she start work? Oh yeah. 7:30. Le sigh. It's gonna be a long fucking day.

Sorry to everyone I missed yesterday. I left IM signed in when I wasn't around. I'm just that kind of clever.

And in totally unrelated news, a wonderfully happy birthday to Lottie! Much love and happiness, beautiful woman! MWAH!
linden_jay: (Hereos- Grunberg fangirls unite)
I still can't sleep even though the boy is here, although that has more to do with having slept an obscene amount during the day yesterday. So it's 6am and I'm still awake and that's just WRONG, seriously.

But, at least I finally got something accomplished. I got... okay, I need to backtrack a little.

This past fall, I got to co-direct a play that the drama teacher at one of the high schools wrote. He and I've got a great working relationship, which is seriously awesome, and he wanted some input into the spring production. Long story short, we're putting on Romeo and Juliet.

Cut for babbling... jump back here for more detail, as well as to find out why Romeo has two mommies... )

So tonight, I finally finished editing the script down to size, and sent it to the primary director. I am exhausted, but giddy. And if there's anyone out there who's really familiar with Shakespeare in general and Romeo and Juliet in particular and you wouldn't mind scanning through for pronoun-change errors and 'what the fuck did you do here?' issues for how I've cut up the script... well, that would be really awesome, actually, 'cause I did most of this at 3 am and afterward and I'm not entirely sure I didn't just create mass blasphemy. More than I already did with my girl Tybalt and Romeo and his two mommies.

Oh my god I'm tired. BED.
linden_jay: (Kitten--Willpower got eatened)
The new kitten is back from the vet, poor baby. Still a little stoned, no longer able to procreate, and her entire little belly is shaved, which I am finding both adorable and strangely hilarious. She keeps giving me this look like 'it's COLD and they took away half of my FUR!' Poor, poor thing. I will sit here and snuggle her on my lap so she can stay cozy. The sacrifices I make, I tell ya.

Also, if I ever remember which store earwormed me with 'Stacy's mom', I'm boycotting it forever.
linden_jay: (SGA- Sheppard Monkey-bitchface)
3:28 am. Why am I not asleep?

Okay, I could be rational and come up with real reasons. I've been sleeping later because it's vacation, so it's harder for me to go asleep. And the AH had to go away on a research trip for almost a week, and I never sleep well when he's not here.

But at least this time it's not because he was gone and I started watching Criminal Minds, Bones, and Dexter, and then freaked out that I was going to be murdered in some particularly gruesome and grisly way. Honestly. I really should know better. I watched The West Wing all afternoon while I crocheted, and then I switched over to Heroes commentary tracks once I finally got tired of pretend American policy.

But it's practically dawn, ferchrisakes, and I'm still awake, and I'm barely even tired. And I have to be up in time to take the kitten to the vet for 8:30am to get fixed. Something tells me I'm going to be grabbing a nap on the couch, then coming home and taking a nap. UGH.

So... it's the new year. To be honest, apart from a few highlights, 2007 licked. A hell of a lot. I'd be tempting fate to say that 2008 couldn't be worse than 2007, so I'm not going to go there, but I'm just really glad to have closed the lid on 2007 and to be moving on to something else. Maybe I'll do one of those year in review thingies later, but for right now? Imma go faceplant on the couch with an armful of kitten and hope that helps.
linden_jay: (Heroes- Mohinder/Sylar...get over it?)
This is just inhuman. It's Saturday, I couldn't sleep until almost 3 am last night, and I'm up before 8:30 am. Why? Because I have to be sworn in as a shiny brand new member of the union. What kind of union has meetings at nine am on a Saturday for the love of Pete!

They can make me go. They can't make me happy about it, and they can't make me pay attention.

Gah. I should bring my knitting or something. At least then I'd have something to keep me awake.
linden_jay: (Daniel Craig does not give a damn)
I just had a three day weekend--I shouldn't be this tired, honestly. Which isn't stopping me from feeling like I just got run over by a very large truck.

Most people have it in for Mondays. For me? It's Tuesdays. I leave the house at 8:30, so in, well, two minutes, not that I'm out of my pj's yet, and I don't get to be home for more than 40 minutes at a stretch until nearly ten. Work, going to practice before choir, or sometimes more work, play rehearsal, a short break for dinner, and three hours of choir. Tuesdays blow.

And the kidlets have had a four day weekend, since Friday and Monday were days off, so they should be coming back energized and zooey. Wish me luck not killing any of them.
linden_jay: (Bored Now.)
I am in exile! It's a self imposed exile, but it's exile nonetheless. )

As for the lj-related shenanigans )

I'm not making any decisions on staying or going at this point, and I will most likely maintain an lj presence/cross post my stuff here even if there is a fandom exodus. So, if there IS a fandom exodus, this is where you can find me:

Journalfen. Personally, I love journalfen. The maintainers are fandom folk too, and they do a great job both with keeping things going with limited resources, AND in communicating with people when there are problems, expected outages, or whatever else. If you don't like fandom wank--hey, that's okay. Plenty of people over there have nothing to do with fandom wank, so come on over. Also, I have a paid account or three over there, so if there's anyone who is 18 or over, a fandom person, and wants a journal, comment or email me (jay.linden at gmail dot com) and I can hook you up.

I'm also about at:





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February 2012

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